Pardon My English

A Losing Winner

Column by Katie Ehle

The ball dropped to the gym floor.

The football didn’t get caught for a touchdown.

My name wasn’t called by the announcer.

Shock. Disbelief. Heartbreak. Losing.  It’s a daily thing that keeps the world turning.  Someone has to win and someone always has to lose.  If no one lost, winning wouldn’t be as gratifying. But why must someone suffer in pain so someone else can rejoice in success?

I’ve put on fake nails and a big smile twice now in hopes of winning a crown and a sash.  Both times I’ve been let down.  Both times I stood on stage feeling, first shocked, then humiliated that I wasn’t good enough. 

The first time was on stage in front of all my friends and family in the Miss Jefferson County Pageant.  Smiling, dancing, smiling, walking, smiling, talking.  When the five of us held hands at the end and the name the announcer called wasn’t mine, I wanted to cry and run off the stage. 

But I kept on smiling and two months later, I did it again in the Harvest of Harmony Pageant.  I spent all day with 39 girls I didn’t know, smiled and stood up straight.  I walked across the stage in front of an unknown audience.  The announcer called ten names; six finalists, one congeniality, two runner ups, and the winner.  None of them were my name. The same feelings came back like before, but this time stupidity and regret came too.  Why did I put myself through that again?

While watching a Fairbury volleyball game, I saw the same thing. The ball dropped more on one side of the net than the other. The losing team tried to fight back, but the winning team held their lead. Fairbury lost.

The winners know what it takes though.  Practice.  Determination.  Confidence.  Skill.  Winners have been losers before and they know what it feels like to be crushed.  So at the next opportunity, they ran faster, stood up straighter, and pushed themselves farther than before so they wouldn’t have to go through that pain again and instead feel the rush of success. 

But what if after all the practicing, you still lose?  It’s not fair.  As long as there are competitions, there will always be a loser.  Except maybe in kindergarten, when you had a counting test, and whoever counted the farthest won a lollipop.  But then when it was over, everyone in the class got a lollipop anyway just for trying. 

And we were all happy back then.  We didn’t worry who was better at reading out loud or playing kickball. Then, we all grew up and our eyes were opened to the competitive world.  But maybe we should remember the grade school days when winning wasn’t everything; just getting to play was fulfillment enough.

So it’s like your parents always say, if you tried your hardest and did the best you could do, maybe a judge or scoreboard can’t measure your success. It’s how you feel inside whether you’re a winner or loser.  When I was riding on the back of the convertible in the Harvest of Harmony parade, after the pageant, seeing everyone waving at me, I felt like a winner, and I didn’t need a judge or crown to tell me that.

By: Katie Ehle

Fairbury Jr/Sr High School
1501 9th Street
Fairbury, NE 68352
(402)-729-6116 ext 106